Fasten your pouches and hang on tight, the possum pun express is about to leave the station! Ever wondered why possums play dead? It’s because they’re too busy laughing at their own jokes, of course! In this tree-swinging article, we’ll dive into the wild world of possum humor, unearthing jokes so funny they’ll have you grinning like a marsupial caught in the headlights. Prepare to chortle, chuckle, and guffaw as we navigate through the finest comedy this side of the outback. But be warned, these possum jokes might just leave you “hanging” for more!
Best Possum Jokes
“What did the mother possum say to her son?
“Quit hanging around all day and do something!””
“What do you call a possum laying in the middle of the road?
Clearly, that’s a Himalayan possum.”
“Why did the possum cross the road?
To visit his flat mate!”
“How many rednecks does it take to eat a ‘possum?
Two. One to eat and one to watch for cars.”
I asked him what Himalayan possum was and he said, “Oh you know, it’s the kind of possum you find on the road and him a laying there.”
Nothing is im-possum-ble! I believe in you!
“You are opossum!”
“Get it? Opposum kinda sound like awesome!”
“Why did the opossum cross the road?
To get to the middle.”
“What do you call a possum that goes back for seconds on soup
I finally found out the difference between a possum and an opossum. Opossums are Irish.
“What do possums and the Detroit Tigers have in common?
Both play dead at home & get killed on the road.”
“What do you call a possum from Ireland?
“Why did the chicken cross the road?
To prove to the possum it could be done.”
“What’s a seven-course meal in Alabama?
A possum and a six-pack.”
“What do you call a possum who can’t pee
“What do you get when you cross a bull and a possum?
That’s a possum bull.”
How did possums learn to play dead? When scientists learned that possums can survive up to 80 rattlesnake bites
A man walks up to the counter at the airport holding a dead possum. The attendant asks Sir, will you be checking that? The man replies No, it’s carrion.
Somewhere in a parallel universe programmer van Rython invented Possum programming language.
Every time I see a possum on the road I run it over… Just to make sure it’s not faking
Hey possum, wanna hang out? Let’s get tot-hangin’!
Possums may not be fast, but they’re definitely fur-ocious.
You can play possum, but you can’t fool a possum.
Possums: masters of the art of blending in.
Possums are like snowflakes – no two are exactly alike.
What do you call a group of possums playing jazz? A possum band!
Why did the possum go to the doctor? He was feeling a little o-possum-tistic.
What do possums like to drink? O-possum juice!
Why did the possum join the circus? For the trape-zee-fun!
“A group of possum played dead in my yard last night
They did a great version of ‘Truckin’”
“Saw a possum on the road while driving to the store this evening.
He was still there on the return trip. He was quite deadicated.”
“I was driving alone on the road the other day and passed a dead animal.
I slowly shook my head and said “”Ohhhhhh……..Possum…..”””
You’re a redneck if…. There is a stuffed ‘possum anywhere in your house.
Knock KnockWho’s there? Possum! Possum who? Possum peace pipe!
Excuse Me! Is it possumable I could have some space?
Come join me on a spooktacular journey into the possumbiities.
In the unique realm of humor, jokes about possums are a delightful oddity, hanging upside down in the comedic world. Unlike the creatures themselves, possum jokes aren’t shy; they strut into the comedy scene with quirky charm and impeccable timing. Why did the possum cross the road? To get to the other punchline! This blend of absurdity and wit makes possum jokes a must-have in every comedian’s repertoire.
But what drives our fascination with these marsupial marvels? Perhaps it’s the possum’s mysterious duality. One moment they’re freezing like a nervous comedian, the next they’re darting away, leaving laughter in their wake. The playing-dead routine itself is ripe for humor, teasing out jokes about possums faking demise to dodge Monday meetings or fainting at restaurant bills.
Possum jokes are not just an amusing subgenre; they’re a window into a quirky wildlife perspective. Next time you spot a possum, take a moment to ponder the possible punchlines. You might find yourself chuckling at the rich tapestry of humor they weave, giving these misunderstood marsupials the comedic spotlight they so rightly deserve.